Helping Your Child Navigate Big Emotions
How can you be intentional with engaging your children about their big emotions?
Being a parent is one of the most rewarding yet hardest jobs on the planet. There are so many things that we try to navigate to help our children, but it can be tricky to know how to help our children navigate their big emotions. Isn’t it hard to get it right, even as adults? Just as children differ in personality, so too does the display of emotions differ from one child to the next. For children who feel deeply or are highly sensitive, responding to big emotions might look like inconsolable wailing because of being overwhelmed or having their feelings hurt by another child. It may also look like having an upset tummy. For children who are not highly sensitive, responding to big emotions might look like shutting down, keeping to themselves or pretending that nothing is bothering them. Although these intense and unpredictable moments have the tendency to leave you as a parent or caregiver perplexed or unsure of what to do next, it is possible to help the children in your life progress through these moments.
It's important to remember that emotions give us information about our experiences. Start by teaching your children how to name what they are feeling. If they are screaming, maybe you can say, “I understand that something is upsetting you right now. Instead of screaming, how about you try saying, ‘I feel frustrated.” When children have language for how they are feeling they are more able to process their reality and develop a healthier response.
Seek to create a safe environment that invites all their emotions, even the not so pleasant ones. I’'s important to try not to dismiss their emotions or diminish their experience. Acknowledging your child’s feelings, communicates that you care and presents an opportunity for them to be receptive to growth—they may cooperate when you try to help calm them down.
Be transparent. As you give age-appropriate language to your children about your big emotions, they will be more prone to engage in dialogue with you about theirs and become less reactive.
When engaging our children concerning their big emotions, we also present an opportunity to usher them into the presence of God by reading scripture together and spending time in prayer. We teach our children that God uses emotions to develop Godly character and draw us closer to Him.
How can you be intentional with engaging your children about their big emotions?
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